Work Besties Who Podcast
Building a bold community of work besties 💼👯♀️ to bond 🤝💞, banter 😂🎉, and bloom 🌸✨
🎙️ Listen to the Work Besties Who Podcast: where workplace friendships get real! From tea spills to relatable laughs, we’re unpacking everything about work life's ups, downs, and unforgettable moments.
✨ Join us for candid chats, relatable stories, and a sprinkle of chaos—because what’s work without a little drama and a lot of fun?
💼😄 Hit play, and let’s dive into the messy magic of workplace connections together!
Work Besties:-)
Work Besties Who Podcast
Discover the Secrets of the Dynamic Trio featuring Ryan (World's Okayest School Psych), Danielle & Jen
Ryan, Jen & Danielle the Dynamic Trio—The Real-Life Avengers of Education
In this hilarious yet deeply heartfelt episode, Ryan, the World’s Okayest School Psych, is back—this time with his dynamic duo of work besties, Danielle and Jen. The trio spills the tea on surviving (and thriving) in the emotionally charged world of special education while keeping their friendship rock-solid. From managing work-life boundaries to navigating honest conversations, this episode serves up laughs, wisdom, and practical tips on balancing tough jobs with tight-knit friendships. Spoiler alert: memes and scorpion jokes are involved.
Top 5 Takeaways
- Work Besties Make the Tough Days Better: You don’t have to face challenges alone when you have a trusted circle.
- Be Loudly, Authentically You: True friendships start when you show up as your full self.
- Boundaries + Bonds = Success: Healthy friendships and professionalism go hand in hand.
- Communication is a Superpower: How you connect with your team can make or break workplace dynamics.
- Support Systems are Everything: Having people who “get it” is vital in emotionally demanding jobs.
Why Listen?
Come for the laughs and workplace shenanigans, stay for the real talk on why being a work bestie is the ultimate power move in education!
Join Ryan's tribe on IG @worldsokayestschoolpsych
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Work Besties! Theme Song Written by Ralph Lentini @therallyband
Hi, I'm Claude and I'm Jess. We are corporate employees by day, entrepreneurs by night and work besties for life.
Jess:Join us as we explore how work besties lift each other up, laugh through the chaos and thrive together in every industry. Hello everybody, welcome back to Work Besties who Podcast. We are extremely excited for this week's episode because we have two of our absolute favorite guests that we've ever talked to back. The last time they were on, I called them the dynamic duo. This time there's a trio, so we're really, really excited to have Ryanyan, the world's okayest school psych, hey, danielle, our absolute favorite bcba, and then now jen is with us with an interesting twist because jen is the boss is wrong.
Danielle:Somebody needs a boss Ryan, he has a direct supervisor, but he needs these other two wonderful ladies in his life to reign him in.
Claude:To keep him straight.
Ryan:Obviously, they're both my bosses, true? The?
Jess:intention of this episode will be for those who ever question whether you can be besties with somebody that is at a higher level, or potentially even your direct boss. So with that, jim, we'd love you to give just a little bit of background. Ryan, danielle, you guys can do a brief background in case some people haven't listened to the creepy episode, and if they haven't, please do, because it's hysterical well, well, hi everyone.
Jen:I'm Jen. I have been fortunate enough to become part of this trio in the last couple of years. I like to think of myself more as a referee, slash counselor with these two, which is really kind of how this friendship became established. But I have been in the special ed world for about 18 years. My role is called a special ed coordinator, so I directly supervise Danielle, which is new this year, and then I'm going to say I supervise Ryan too. He doesn't like that, but I do so. I just, you know, provide extra support, guidance, any kind of emotional support I can provide for people in our field right now.
Danielle:Your description of a referee, because I do feel like sometimes you're a referee, but then I think on the last podcast I said I was the referee because you do fight you did referee like hey, have you recently maybe talked to jay. Hey, have you maybe. So I feel like we take turns being referees.
Claude:So, is. Ryan a referee at some point.
Ryan:No, they won't even let me do that. I mean, if they need a referee, it's not going to be me.
Jen:I was going to say do you see the common denominator here? I think that's how I ended up in this. Ryan was texting me one day complaining about Danielle, danielle was texting me one day complaining about Ryan, so I just started a group text how can we work through this? And then everyone said sorry. By the end I seemed to be paid for my counseling services, but that did not happen.
Jess:That's what my cup says. That's when your unpaid therapist brought you in.
Danielle:The rest is history. Here we are.
Jess:So before we get into some of that, danielle, danielle, ryan, I know you guys gave a background the last time, but just like a quick re-brief of who you both are.
Danielle:I am Danielle. I am a board certified behavior analyst, which is, in my opinion, a cool behavior scientist. I'm a BCBA in public school, so I get to public school on BCBA all day. It is my love language. I am very passionate about my job, which can come across sometimes aggressive, but I just love my job and love doing what's best for kids. So I am I am your friendly neighborhood BCBA.
Ryan:Friendly, mostly friendly. Okay, I'm a school psychologist and also I live this life 24 seven. I have a 14 year old son now who has profound autism. He's in a special program at school, so my life is like truly just a lot of fun. And Danielle, even Jen, have both helped me, you know, with various situations involving my stance.
Ryan:I was also going to say one of the first times we talked, Jen, is when you and Danielle were in the lobby of the annex building and that's where my office is. At the time All our protocols and everything were stored there and I approached Danielle and just told her about all these protocols that I'm taking for myself without going through the process and as Jen's job as a coordinator, like she's over those protocols, so she's like what Wait?
Jess:a minute.
Ryan:You're stealing, that is not the process.
Jen:He said the protocol lady's in there. I said I'm the protocol lady, Like that's me.
Ryan:I didn't know I was. I just like I like I'm busted, but yeah, and then what did you do? Like a few months later, what did you do?
Jen:we have relocated the protocols to our office now and because ryan went in there, laid on top of the protocols and took selfies and sent them to me like no, he didn't, for real he sure did yeah and like okay, we got to get the protocols out.
Ryan:Like he's stealing they literally relocated them like five, six miles down the road, Like got them away from me.
Jess:I'm surprised it's not like in a moving vehicle, just to make sure you're not there.
Jen:Well, that's a hard lie, let's restrict his badge access to that room. People felt like that was a little harsh but I was like let's just restrict his access.
Ryan:No, that's about it School psychologist and then dad. So I'll just leave it at that for right now.
Jess:And you are a social media creator.
Ryan:Yes, I do have the page RollsOKSchoolPsych. I love memes. I love creating memes. I love finding memes. We need to memes.
Claude:I love finding memes. We need to be a meme at some point.
Jess:Yeah, when do we get to be a meme?
Ryan:Ryan, I can make you a meme. We were just talking before the podcast about Milli Vanilli. I thought you were giving them a hard time and stuff and I like those guys and so I might make a meme about you for making fun of Millie.
Danielle:Vanilli, I was giving you a hard time. I wasn't making fun of Millie.
Ryan:Vanilli, not you you weren't.
Claude:I did so, jen. How did you come in in this, you know?
Jen:it happened. It just happened. I think it really came down to me mediating. This giant argument is really genuinely how it happened. It was like my phone both sides of texting me, so I was like I can't do this, so I just put it all in a group and I was like we're gonna work this out together and then it just that's really how it evolved, and now we work out all of our issues with each other.
Danielle:Well, with Ryanyan danielle and I have been besties for for yourself and ryan, and then me and jen and then ryan together is where are the connector and that's where we had to have the, and we talked about that last time, about having the friend nda.
Danielle:Yeah, yes, yes, yes, and we have two group texts. We have one that we named and then we have one that we were using. This is what Ryan does when he wants something in the group text, he will text me a period, which is my signal that I have to go to find the group text for him, because he can't find it on his phone, and type in the group text. Ryan, did you have something you wanted to say?
Ryan:yes, it's not that that would be me. That's it, that's actually kind of a genius, the group text on my phone. I don't want anyone picking up my phone and going through that text you don't, you don't even want to. I don't want, like anyone, like just I don't want that risk because that's the signal.
Danielle:He does not say anything, he just literally my texture is superior.
Ryan:It's about. It's a bat signal and I need.
Danielle:This is not signal I have to find the group text. Yes, why, don't you just send her a bat? I feel like at least that's cuter. A bat effort.
Ryan:He would have to go, oh geez, and then, and then he would rather just click a period and then that's it. She knows me so well.
Jen:It requires more effort, the period's easier forbid you not respond to him in the group text.
Jess:Then you become a meme, okay so tell, yeah, tell us what's the like dynamics. So there's two group, one has a name.
Ryan:What's that one?
Danielle:okay, lives in the group text that's named. So that's the group text you have to use, so that's the one.
Jess:If you say anything on that, it's got it.
Jen:Ryan will say if we don't respond to him, he does get very upset about that.
Ryan:So we're always very into normal, though like no one I mean let's pause for a second.
Danielle:That's not true, because literally I had to explain to you the other day. When friends text messages, sometimes they just stop talking and then they pick up the conversation the next day. Ryan wants like a formal thank you for texting. Have a great night. I'll talk to you tomorrow.
Ryan:I look at text for like a real life conversation and nobody nobody does that. So there has to be like an end to it, Like how do you end a conversation Every?
Jess:every night and every morning you have to send a good night y'all. Good morning he would like us to be like talk to you later.
Danielle:That's what he wants. Good morning, Clear end. Why don't?
Jess:you say good morning.
Ryan:He's like a non-stop conversation. I admit I am learning like social skills when it comes to text, because I always looked at text as just a regular conversation.
Jen:Okay, but that's not the way it is, apparently just like when you're friends, your conversation just flows like, yeah, you just know you could text at any time with anything and it just if you stop, we stop danielle. And I don't say I mean we do, danielle and I do say good morning to each other every single morning. Okay, and not me, we do every morning.
Ryan:See what I'm saying here.
Jen:It's more of like a check-in, like hey no one checks me.
Danielle:You want us to text you good morning bitch, Because that is literally exactly what we say every morning to each other Morning bitch.
Ryan:Every morning. It might be nice. Yes, I might like it. Yeah, I might like it. Good morning.
Claude:So which group text is the most active?
Ryan:Probably her and Danielle.
Jen:Yeah, we text all day. I'm left out.
Ryan:You're. Yeah, we text all day.
Danielle:I'm left out, you're not you're not left talking about how I complain about being left out.
Ryan:If we talked about what jen and I talked about, you would eventually say stop including me in the text message true, being in education, a female dominated field and like I'm in a cubicle, or sometimes I'll be in a conference room, but I can hear people talking in another room. The stuff they talk about they're talking about someone's talking about hot flashes the other day, but it gets much worse than that. You know, like it's just like wow, like I should not be hearing this.
Claude:You need to understand that also, that it's happening.
Ryan:But you think men have locker room talk. Oh no, you ain't seen that. I mean men have locker room talk too.
Danielle:But I mean I try not to, you know, be in the vicinity of it, but sometimes I just you get upset because you get left out and I can guarantee you 30 minutes into being on group text.
Jess:you would be like I don't want to do this anymore. You'd see that. What is it like? Ryan has left the chat. Yes, yes, no, no, no.
Ryan:You know what? I'll compliment you too, because I was a part of another group chat with two other work friends who are?
Claude:no longer in our district.
Ryan:This guy's spicy Okay.
Jen:Anyway Interesting.
Ryan:Are. They're no longer in our district.
Jen:Okay, okay, anyway, are you doing?
Ryan:a podcast with them too. No, I invited. No, we told them to wait another hour. Anyway, they talk about things that they should leave me out of, so I'm I'm happy that you two are doing that, so thank you and you can't sit there and say, see, I'm always left out, I'm never included. You know that.
Jen:There it is.
Jess:Speaking of victims, the last time we chatted with Danielle and Ryan, we heard about the memes and how Danielle gets pointed out. A lot, jen, I'm assuming, based off of some of the ones we've read, some might actually be about you For sure. And when that happens, how do you feel? How do you take it?
Jen:I think I've been fortunate enough with Ryan that none of them have been geared towards my professionalism, that none of them have been geared towards my professionalism. It's more towards my being a Scorpio and my attitude and my personality. I think there's been a few that have been directed towards the whole leadership team. There's been a few of those. We laugh about it. Nobody's ever been angry at him about it. Well, that's what. Yeah, so I've been on, I haven't been on the side, that danielle has been on where he yeah targets her science.
Ryan:We should bring that up, though, because it's scorpio season right now. It is scorpios are diabolical. I mean, they can be nice people, but they're awesome you gotta watch out for them. Okay, yeah, you do. And like I'll tell you what jen did it. I think it was last year, the year before last year, but there is a call room in our office complex space, so there's a little room that we go into and we can make private calls and you know there's cubicles and everything, don't you?
Ryan:nap in there sometimes. So every now and then I will go in there and take a little power nap, okay, and they know that. Well, not everyone knows that, but anyway, me too. Jen told me that one of my co-workers told on me to my direct supervisor and I thought that was the case, case like six months, until I finally got the truth out of her that she was just playing me. That never happened, guys he was sweating.
Danielle:It was so good.
Ryan:No one knows I was taking a nap I made a meme about it, someone in my office.
Danielle:Being a rat, I don't know who to trust looking at everyone like I'm gonna cut you for telling on me, and gigglies just giggly because like he doesn't know I didn't trust anyone because I thought someone told on me but she kept and she didn't just volunteer and tell me one day.
Ryan:I just connected the dots and I kind of backed her into a corner and then she's like yes, you know you're right, everyone else knew but, you so funny. But now it doesn't matter, yourself out, because everybody that supervisor, though, doesn't work here anymore, so I don't care direct supervisor does yeah, but your current supervisor does but you know what it is actually shown in other countries.
Claude:People take naps and it's actually good.
Jess:Yeah, like parents actually help.
Claude:It's actually very helpful and can help you during the day. Danielle and Jen, Because now you say that in the last year you became Jen, you're the supervisor of Danielle. Year you became Jen, you're the supervisor of Danielle did your relationship because there's something that we don't agree with Jess did your relationship change.
Jess:Just the background of what what she means by our differences. I believe you can be work besties with anybody, any level doesn't really matter whether they're above you, whether they're peer or not, and she's very clear it should be you can be yeah like you?
Ryan:no, no, you can be friendly and very friendly, but there are things that we I will not share one of those.
Jen:I think that it's changed at all. I think we've always been very good at being intentional about the boundary and her understanding. Sometimes I have to draw a line or have a hard conversation, but I don't think it's changed at all.
Danielle:I think, like for me, what's nice of like having your work, like your friend, as your supervisor and I can have all of my angry feel, like these are all of my feelings, I can get those out so we can have a professional conversation. But then we can have a professional conversation, but then I can have a conversation with you later about, like I'm really upset about this because I know if we have to have a difficult conversation, it's not her right. I'm not upset.
Jess:She's delivering information to me A lot of times.
Danielle:Right, you have to reflect on your own. Like I have to think well, what did I do? To reflect on your own, like I have to think, well, what did I do? Or if I feel like I have, I'm gonna get in trouble, I just tell on myself ahead of time. I think I called her the other day and I said, well, I'm probably gonna be in trouble because I made somebody so mad. Just know, it's probably coming like usually, I'm like trying to get ahead of the game and I think I know how to like.
Jen:Thanks to Danielle, because I know her reaction after. So I can tell her something in the moment and we can talk about it, and I know the next day she's still going to have feelings. Sometimes I'll get to the point where, okay, we've got to stop, I think you're stuck on this and so it's okay. This is just information, but I know that about her, so I know how to say it. In a way, I can be very brutally honest with her and I can also, but I also know how to say it to her in a way that that respects how she is going to react and and know down the road, like we're gonna have to revisit the conversation because she's that and you know so how.
Claude:That it will not break that friendship?
Jen:No, and I never worry about that.
Jess:Yeah, you know her well enough that it's easier to manage somebody when you what they'll be thinking of, what they'll be focused on and how you can help them grow it.
Jen:I think the biggest thing is everybody.
Claude:I'm not saying you cannot be. See, this is Daniel.
Jess:Ryan, this is how our fights are.
Claude:But I'm not saying you cannot be friends, right? I'm just saying work besties, because for me, but they are work besties. Yeah, I understand, so it is a point for me. Besties, yeah, I understand, so there's a point for me. It's just that at some point, if I have, I can be very friendly with my boss. But there are things that I would not say the same. If it, you know, with a work bestie Like I would be able to tell you stop freaking, making so much noise with your chewing gum.
Claude:I will not chewing gum but I will not say it to my boss I wanted to provide some clarity to this situation.
Danielle:Oh, here we go. You weren't talking, it wasn't about you for a minute, so go ahead no, no, and it's all right.
Ryan:I'm just providing some context. Yes, I think, claude, it works in this situation because Jen is Danielle's direct supervisor, but she's not Danielle's only boss, it's office space. You know, like I have eight bosses, bob, you know. So above Jen, there's still an assistant director, then there's a direct, then there's an executive director, right, ryan?
Jess:I think you're done talking, assistant director.
Claude:then there's a direct, then there's an executive director but that's the truth I mean.
Jen:So I know that if it got to that it would never get to that point, but if it did and I needed help, then someone could help with that conversation. But I think the biggest difference is that more people have accepted our friendship. I think that was very difficult for people at first to accept. That's a good point. That was hard and now people are like okay, they're friends, like this is it, this is how it is. But it wasn't hard for people to accept at first. It was very difficult.
Claude:So, how come how? What were people Like? What were people like?
Danielle:what were people either saying or doing on that we weren't even she wasn't even my direct supervisor at the time, and we didn't even work together so and that was an issue then, and that's like I would think it would have been now I was.
Ryan:I'm oblivious to that.
Danielle:I didn't know there was an issue yeah, just people that you're around yeah I think that the the climate has changed and so people have are like well, they're just friends, that. But before certain people were struggling that we were friends, even though we never worked directly together and like we, we didn't even make it like known that we were friends, we didn't really post pictures. But now people know that's why I am, she's my direct supervisor, because we're just, we're friends and they know that she delivers information better to me.
Jen:People have learned to trust that we will, that neither side would take advantage of that. That's why it's now okay and understand and we actually like I think we work very well together. Um, and so it's just embraced now and people are, are okay. Do you think that's how it discouraged?
Jess:others, then to have that similar relation, because I do think where you're going with this, it makes sense to have that familiarity with an individual when you do manage them, because then you're interacting with them more like a best friend, which is going to make things a little bit easier, and both of you are in the same way.
Danielle:Yeah, because you can deliver the information it's like. So, like last year, I went through a divorce right, and so Jen Hanf and Ryan knew like a handful of people that knew the whole year that it was happening yeah and so she was able to navigate some conversations about like, about me knowing I was going through those things because I may have not reacted the best, and she could kind of facilitate that on the back end.
Danielle:For me yeah, or and say I, I need, like where, where are you at emotionally, like I know how to give you the information.
Danielle:So I think, it's nice to have those relationships so that you can be mindful, like that there's a person outside of work. But all of that outside work stuff affects you at work and so having those people that you can go to and be like, hey, I need to tell you this yeah, and did you at some point feel like people thought, because you were friends, people felt that there could be favoritism absolutely ready.
Danielle:For two years, three years, we didn't work directly together. Right, it would have been no favoritism, no, because we directly did not work together, it was just.
Jen:It was interesting people's perception of situation I think that now that we work directly together, danielle should be more worried because I know her skill set and so I'm like I know I can ask her to do these things. You know what I mean? Like ask me to do those things I do, and I still ask her then, but this, you know what I'm saying like I have complete 100 faith and trust in her. That I have to catch myself and pull back and say, but you can't put one more thing on her. You know what I mean? Like I have to have an internal dialogue.
Jess:Sometimes, when your friends and your friend is a supervisor, they might actually put more work on you because they trust you and they feel comfortable. That is true. That is a risk I have to have that internal conversation. Yeah, If you are that close, usually the person can report like challenge back and be like I noticed my workload stuff. Right.
Jen:I mean you lean towards the people you know can do the job and you know that you can say I need this and it'll happen, and it'll be done and it's great and kids benefit. Not that other people aren't that way, but it's. You know, everyone has a different skill set and I so admire danielle's skill set, so it's really hard to not. I have to tell myself no, jen, you can't ask her to do that. You know what I mean. So that's.
Ryan:That's a fair assessment to say you both have to make sure you're still checking balance yeah, I'll compliment you, danielle, because it's true, like danielle, may become overwhelmed and frustrated or stressed out internally, but there's no situation at work that you can't handle.
Danielle:That's very nice. Yeah true, two nice things. Wait, there's a meme that Ryan posted.
Jess:It was something like when you're taking care of a child. It was a picture of a lady like setting up a car seat, as if you're going to like steal the kid.
Ryan:So clearly you have that. That's my main. Thank you, yes, no, I mean sometimes you have this like boundary sometimes you work with the kid and that kid is so cute and adorable, you just want to take them home all the time.
Jen:I always say do you think their mom would miss them if I take them?
Danielle:I would have a house. Yes, you just want to take and love and snow. Just have a car.
Ryan:Seat in my car like a beast is ready for that situation.
Danielle:I love that yeah and like the kids you want to take are always like the most difficult kids you love them so much because they're so hard and you just want to like take them and love them and like fix it all and you know some of them we do.
Jen:We do have a principal. She's now a principal in our district to the same scenario. But she was like I'm going to get my foster care license and now she's fostering kids from her school because they're so cute and need help and she loves them and so she's like a real life.
Jess:Yeah, that's a great scenario.
Ryan:Yeah, I have a friend that's a social worker that did that like literally took in a kid, fostering that kid right now, I think, like a you know, foster to adopt or whatever they call it.
Claude:That's incredible, like how much you know you care about, really like helping those kids and it's so beautiful, you know, as a parent, to know that there are people you know like you and really caring so much. It's so, so lovely to hear.
Jess:Oh, it makes you warm in the heart yeah, as frustrating as your job may be, then that's what makes the cold dead heart warm is like yeah you have for helping those really hard kids.
Danielle:Yeah, I don't know how people do a lot of feelings and like hard kids are my soft, that people feel like I'm aggressive about a kid but I'm like super passionate about making sure hard kids get taken care of because they're hard and a lot of times what happens is they're hard and people just give up, and all three of us are very passionate about communicating the need that they have and they how to support them and and it's been some of our hardest conversations is, danielle, like you've got to let other people do their job too.
Jen:You can't do everything.
Claude:I think that's where the majority of our most passionate conversations have come from, yeah, and, and it must be also emotionally taxing on you, right, and that's why sometimes we love I love those, this three-way right, you know, going back and forth. But I'm sure it's also, you know it's so emotionally taxing that you need those relief and those fan inventing to with your work besties, because they are there, they know where they are going through, the same way where you're going through. So I think it's so important.
Jen:Yeah, absolutely, and they get to be more frontline with kids. I don't get. I get the adults and the parents, and so my release is going to see kids you know any kids but they are more directly on the front lines with the kiddos and so I am envious of that in their roles.
Claude:But I'm sure that dealing with the parents also is not a piece of cake.
Jen:No, that's where most of my emotional exhaustion comes from. It's just adults. Adults are so much harder than kids sometimes. You know we have great parents.
Ryan:But Jen does not work with all the parents. She works when, basically, someone's unhappy. And I'm not saying these parents don't have a right to be unhappy about what they're happy about. You know because I'm a sped parent myself. I'm just saying those are the parents you work with, the ones that are not happy about something.
Jen:And Ryan does a good job of keeping that separate with our friendship, because he could easily pull me into that, even though I'm not really assigned to that. It would be easy for him to vent about those things and he does a really good job of not keeping our friendship separate from him being a parent.
Jess:Yeah, and so I appreciate why don't, why don't we change topics? This is great that you guys have each other to vent and definitely help with the balance between your work, but also being a parent knowing the behind the scenes. What do you guys do just to have fun?
Ryan:Danielle and Jen can answer that, because they don't include me in their fun, that's not true. I'll just sit back here we go, I should do my own podcast called the Third Will, and it will be like a support group for people that are a third will in a friend trio.
Claude:The trio is always hard, like friendship, trio is always a bit hard.
Ryan:No, it's fine, I'm like you know.
Danielle:Like Ryan's perception is that Jen and I are out in crop tops and short shorts and having a great time from the rafters and I swear to God god, we are literally best friends and never see each other outside of work. No, I mean no, do you? Want when I see there's on instagram hanging out outside of work literally see, probably physically see, each other outside of work, probably once a month in the middle of the day, because by the time it's nighttime we both want to be on our couches in our pajamas.
Ryan:Yeah, so ryan's perception is that we're out here like no, I'm not your boyfriend like why would I care what you're wearing? That has nothing to do with it.
Danielle:I was painting a picture your perception of going out and partying To.
Jess:FOMO, it's the fear of missing out on whatever fun time they're having in LA.
Ryan:I don't care what you hear.
Danielle:Everyone's on everyone. I'm on my couch. Jen is on her couch Literally, what are you doing? And then it's a picture of her on the couch with the dogs. I'm meandering around my house and then I'm like I'm on my couch.
Jen:That's literally's literally. I mean we will go on a thrifting adventure every now and then.
Ryan:That's our favorite thing to do.
Jen:Yeah, stop it right now. You would not go with us if we asked you. You want to go to Goodwill?
Ryan:I do not, okay, they. They've taken trips, not me. I wasn't included in any of them, but you did always bring me back a magnet.
Jess:So I appreciate it. He is included you got a magnet.
Claude:So they think of you. Right, it's like the other part of the trio.
Ryan:Yes, yeah, I mean they don't include me, but they think about me, so that's fine, I'm always there in spirit.
Jess:There you go, you're always writing a meme about them.
Danielle:There's always like one, like passive, aggressive comment.
Jen:Every time, Just when you think it's going to be real nice, there's something and you're like there it is.
Ryan:I've said many nice comments so far in this.
Danielle:You say something passive, aggressive, but then you say something nice. It's like a cancel out. You're never in the win column.
Jen:It's like I'm sorry, but situation.
Ryan:As long as I don't walk away from her in the lose column. Okay, I see.
Danielle:I feel you. So either nothing or one just never in the loose.
Ryan:Good to know as long as I'm not losing. Yeah, you know, we're not having like some big fallout from whatever this happened in this podcast. Oh no, my god. No, we've never had a fallout.
Jess:We've had some no you know what I was gonna say. I feel like that's what kind of brought you in.
Ryan:Jen was one of the conversations last time percent was jen and I did not a fallout, but me I want to call it a full-on fallout. But she got really mad at me, um, but kind of overreacted give the background first, give a little bit of I want to tell it, because it they were text messaging.
Danielle:We were all text messaging back and forth. So have you ever seen ace ventura movie? Okay, well, you know where he, dan finkel, misses the kick and it's the kick heard around the world.
Ryan:Okay, we're text messaging back and forth and Ryan makes Jen angry and she said F you and it was like the text message heard around the world and I was like A week later I have an apology notepad and I felt like she was ready, you know, to reconcile, so I sent her a blank apology note and had her fill it out and she sent it back to me, pulled out and now we're good, but I have to apologize, rolling it too, you know, because obviously I did something that led up to that whatever I, yes, I don't even remember what it was.
Jen:You might, I don't either I think the thing to know is I am good till I'm not. So it takes a lot to get me to that point so it had probably been a constant, like poke, poke, literally like this yeah.
Danielle:I was like oh my gosh. They're like yeah, it was epic, so yeah it's like you know, talking about like there's three of us. So then, instead of it being like me and Jen are texting about Ryan, ryan is texting me, jen is texting me. I'm so mad at Ryan and she was like I can't believe she said that to me and I'm like I'm facilitating, I'm like well, maybe she was just really upset.
Jess:Like maybe Ryan was like like when did I get stuck mediator?
Danielle:yeah, I am not good at that. That's Ryan's job. Ryan's job is the feelings, and I was like my gosh, this is. I was like I don't know what to do.
Ryan:Are you okay, claude and Jess? I mean, like I know, this is a lot, we're a lot.
Claude:You guys are great.
Jess:No, it's great?
Claude:No, I think it's real. You know, you can see, you know it's like the love and the frustration because, at the end of the day, that's what's relationship. Right Relationship is like work, besties is like any relationship.
Claude:It's not all rosy because and thank God, otherwise it's kind of boring. You know it's at the end of the day that's where you're going to be frustrated with each other, but you kiss and make up. And that was really make the friendship so important and so real, because otherwise, if you didn't have this friendship and there's like, let's say, a fallout, then you're like you know what I'm done, I don't need that relationship, but you do value that relationship because it brings you know a lot of yeah, better than you like.
Jess:You guys individually are great people, but all together you're like bettering each other and you're finding ways to challenge, which also means the pitfalls are the annoying habits like my loud gum chewing and you're like, oh god, all the time because I feel like I'm deaf. Oh yeah, she can't hear me I talk very loud, so she'll be like what I'm like.
Claude:I cannot talk any louder like I am already and I think it became like a tick right, like something that I say.
Jess:I'm just saying what it's because she doesn't listen I don't listen.
Claude:But you know, at the end of the day that's what is important. Like, yeah, you know you're fighting for your friendship, because otherwise it's very easy. You know the smallest little thing you're like. You know what done I? I was going to say a bad word, but whatever, I don't need that.
Jess:But you need each other. But I think yeah, I think you guys are great examples of you, can be so close to each other, understand the how and what goes on behind your different roles, even though they're different, um, help each other with it, but then at times, get frustrated as well.
Jess:That's life which is reality, but the fact that you do continue to figure out ways to still maintain your friendship or get back to that friendship. It's what's going to better, not just you guys, you three, but most likely where you all work, and then everybody else sees this and it's like a trickle effect and it just brings that positivity and lovingness, that is kind of missing in the world that we need more and more examples of so.
Ryan:Another thing is that we're all there. We're all present, like I mean, we're in a time where a lot of district employees are leaving, finding other opportunities, but we're still here we're, we're all not that we will all work together forever. I'm sure you know, but still, I mean right now though. You know we've gone through a lot, you know just work-wise and we're all still here and all still showing up, you know, and giving it our all which that's a common theme.
Jess:We're hearing across all industries, walks of life, like it's getting harder and harder. Less people there, more people leaving a lot more turnover. So the examples of people coming close and helping each other is so important because you need.
Ryan:You need that yeah, because I'm in year six of this district, danielle you're in year what 14. 14, and Jen, you're in year five.
Claude:Yeah, you saw it all and you can actually, you know, talk to it and like check in with each other.
Claude:You know, and helping each other, you know, with all the things that, all the experience that you've had all together, you know, and and helping each other, you know, with all the thing that, all the experience that you've had, all together, you know, and that is, I mean, look, I think your relationship it's funny, you know, coming from the outside it's, you know, we laugh and that's why, also, we, we, we wanted you back because it's not only ha-ha, because behind it you still see the love for each other, you know, and the support for each other, and what we see is that real friendship, which is the real friendship. That's what I see from the outside.
Jess:A great way to wrap this up. A great way to wrap this up knowing that you three do leverage each other so well maybe not all the time, but for the most part. Do you have any advice for future or even current people in your workplace that help them find their work besties? Yeah, and have that relationship.
Jen:We have to get away from this thought that you can't be friends with your supervisor or somebody because we all need each other right now. Public education is just a difficult space If you don't have those relationships and if you try to say I can't have a relationship with that person because of this, you're missing out on an opportunity to really find somebody to support you and be there for you, and so I think we just have to move away from that. It's all about being professional and respecting boundaries and if you trust each other and you know that that other person has your best interest in mind always. But I think we just have to all be there for each other right now. It's an impossible place to be in public ed right now, and so that my friendships are what keeps me going.
Claude:I love that, Ryan Danielle.
Ryan:Okay, you said Ryan first, so I'll go first, that's okay. I think my advice is just be yourself very loudly, and that's what I do. And when I am fully myself, a lot of people might scatter. And the people that are still there, you know, like Danielle and Jen and there's been a couple others, you know those are my people. You know I mean honestly, I mean you want to be a good coworker and kind and supportive and all that. But you know, just don't be a chameleon, don't try to blend in or try to be something else. You know to fit in, just be yourself. And then the friendships I think from that will just come, you know, and they may not come right away either. I mean, I think Danielle and I worked together a couple of years and Jen a few years before we started friends. It's not something that always happens instantly. And Danielle said last time don't judge a book by its cover, which I don't know what that means. Like who's this funny looking bald white guy?
Danielle:I think like. For me, what that means is like there's going to be people that you come in contact with at first, that you're like you are not for me yeah. Thank you, but then the more you spend time with them.
Jess:You're like oh, actually I do really like you.
Danielle:Yeah, you are for me, you, that's, that's where those are, like your really strong relationships of you know you're like I didn't know. I didn't really think I was gonna like you at first yeah, danielle, you are not.
Danielle:For me is your default setting, though that's it's mine too, pretty much right, it's one of those things like you, just be yourself, because the people your people will be attracted to you and they'll be the ones that for you and you're gonna people are your friends and then find out that they're they're not or they are your work friends and but I I think it is you. You can't judge that initial like few contacts with someone of like you're not for me, like maybe they're a lot, and then, just kidding, I really do like you well, thank you guys.
Jess:As always, you're very entertaining we learned a lot, yeah and deep at the same time.
Jess:And if there was a way to summarize you guys, I would say you are very real, You're very authentic and you are like a family. The good and the bad comes out, but it's because you guys care so much and we appreciate you guys being a part of our work Bestie community and being so willing to share all of this and help bring this message broader out there and hopefully more and more people in the education field can take a look at this. Thank you, Work besties.
