Success Than What? With Elena Donskaya

Elena Donskaya had the career, the title, the team, the family, and everything that looked like success from the outside. But inside, something felt off.

In this episode, Elena opens up about the moment she realized her “first mountain” wasn’t fulfilling what it had promised, how she began listening to the whispers of her intuition, and what eventually led her from Wall Street into coaching women through burnout, identity shifts, and self-reconnection.

We also talk about what a feminine energy coach actually does, why so many high-achieving women feel numb or disconnected, how overthinking fuels burnout, and why clarity often starts with slowing down enough to hear yourself again.

This conversation is for anyone who has ever thought: I did everything right… so why doesn’t this feel right?

In this episode, we cover:

• Elena’s breaking point after achieving the “dream” on paper
• Why success doesn’t always equal fulfillment
• What feminine energy coaching means in practice
• How intuition can show up in everyday life
• The role of stress, burnout, and disconnection in high-achieving women
• Why identity shifts matter more than just changing habits
• How to tell when it may be time for a pivot
• Why clarity comes from space, stillness, and self-trust

Connect with Elena:

• Instagram: @elenavisionary 
• LinkedIn: Elena Donskaya, MBA 
• Skool community: Awakened Woman Academy

You can watch the full episode on Youtube
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Work Besties! Theme Song Written by Ralph Lentini @therallyband

Transcript

Elena’s subway platform breaking point

Elena Donskaya 0:00

I remember standing on a subway platform one day with a to-do list in my head, coffee in my hands. I just dropped off my kids to school, and I felt like I'm exhausted. What am I doing is the soul to life. That first mountain that I climbed didn't fulfill what it was promising me.

Claude F 0:16

Hi, I'm Claude. And I'm Jess. We are corporate employees by day, entrepreneurs by night, and work besties for life.

Meet Elena: Wall Street To Coach

Jess K 0:25

Join us as we explore how work besties lift each other up, laugh through the chaos, and thrive together in every industry. Work besties. Hey Work Besties. Today we're talking with Elena Dunskaya, former Wall Street VP who checked all the boxes.

Claude F 0:43

She's now a feminine energy coach. So let's get started.

Jess K 0:47

Well, Elena, you had that dream career on paper. When did you realize it no longer fit for you? And what did you feel like internally?

Losing Playfulness And Awakening

What a feminine energy coach actually does

Elena Donskaya 0:56

Well, first of all, so thank you so much for having me on your podcast. I'm excited for our conversation and welcoming everybody who's gonna be listening. Like you said, I've selected the boxes on many things that we all women are being told that if we have a career, we have a family, if we achieve this and that, we should have a fulfillment. And I've checked all the boxes. I originally came to America. I'm an immigrant. I came to America when I was 17 years old without speaking English, without having any connection, without knowing nothing. And I decided that I want to live an American dream. And when I was asking people, what is the American dream when living in New York City? And people were just saying, like, well, if you want to have money and travel and have all the things and do all the things, go into the business school and go to Wall Street. And this is what I did. I ended up going to college. I got my MBA. And I ended up working in investment banking for many years. And I want to say in my early to mid-30s, when I was already a mother of two, I had a career, I was a VP, I had a team, I've had the things. What I really was missing, that femininity, which is the playfulness, that natural things that we all had as girls, and somehow like it disappeared. And the decision was really well, I I've met a spiritual teacher through whom I had a spiritual awakening, what I call a spiritual awakening, or at least like an insight, a realization of something that is far more than what I knew myself to be. Because I truly believe that we don't fully know who we are who we are. We just associate ourselves with the body and the mind. And I started to explore more of who I am. And this is what took me on a journey to quitting my corporate career, becoming a coach. I never thought. If you were to tell me this 10, 15 years ago, I would like to laugh at you. Like, there's no absolutely no way. Because I was a very like a career girl, and I was, yeah, I thought this is what I'm gonna be doing for the rest of my life.

Claude F 2:46

You said you were um feminine energy coach. So exactly, what do you work with with your clients? I work a lot with the body and energy field.

The common reasons women seek Elena out

Elena Donskaya 3:00

So besides this physical body that we have, we have energetic field all around us, our aura, and all within us. In psychology, they call it nervous system, right? We have a nervous system that's running through our body, right? We have endocrine system, we have an immune system, we have all these parts of us that a lot of women have disconnect with because of stress, because of the environment that we live in. And I definitely experienced this being on Wall Street and having and being a mother of two children. I was experiencing a lot of stress. I was experiencing a lot of anxieties, a lot of burnout, a lot of those feelings which make you disconnect from your own state of being, from your own pleasure, from your own joy, from your own fulfillment. So I help women reconnect back to that part of themselves through various tools and practices where we work with the body and we'll work with the energy. So there are different meditation practices, there are different energetic practices, basically reconnecting back to your heart and to your body. What is the most common way people are coming and seeking you out? It comes through some sort of a catalyst event in woman's life. Something that, like kind of, I don't want to say rock bottom. But like when you hit rock bottom, I always say great, because there's nowhere further to go but up.

Jess K 4:15

Yeah, yeah.

Identity Shifts Over Habit Hacks

Elena Donskaya 4:16

Let's just go up, right? But very often women do get with those whispers, like I call it, right? Like those feelings, those signs that awaken them. And like there's something more to me, there's something more to life. I want to do something else. And usually I attract those women that are on this path already. But very often there's some sort of a catalyst event that happens. Maybe there's a career change that they're experiencing, right? Maybe there is like I've had somebody that came to my world, like she got fired like three times from different jobs within 18 months. I think it's gotta be like I have to do something else. And after I work together, she actually went back to school to become a therapist because she had this innate, like she had this desire to help people like I do. So I had people coming to me when they go through a breakup. A lot of women start asking those questions about their self-worth when it comes to relationship, when they experience a divorce, uh, you know, a betrayal, infidelity, something like that. And they're like, Oh, what's wrong with me? Like, why did it happen? Like, what's wrong with me? They start asking that, right? Usually, when women experience some sort of a thing within their self-worth when it comes either to money or to relationships, or they just achieved so many things. Like they check the boxes, like I they achieved so many things, and they ask me, like, okay, what's next? Because the strategy that gets you to where you are today, and that's what happened to me, the strategy that got me to where I was were not the same strategies that can get you to the next level. To get to the next level, you need a different identity. You know how at New Year's everybody's putting those newest resolutions, but statistics say by the end of February, like 80% of resolutions fail. Why? Because people only do things on external, they try to change their habits without changing themselves. So I work more at identity level and energetic level to change who you are, to change who you're being. Again, not necessarily to change because something is wrong with you, but if you are thinking like you hit the ceiling and you want to get to that next level, you need new, you need a different operating system within you energetically and identity-wise, like a different self-image, where you're like, okay, I'm gonna get an upgrade and then get to that next level. So I I I always say, I meet you where you are, right? Like women come to me from all walks of life. Uh, but of course, I attract a lot of high achieving women. And when I say high achieving, not necessarily because you're a CEO or founder of the company or running a big team. High achieving is this pattern within so many women to do so many things, to do great things. And they want, they have this desire to uh to achieve at different levels. And this is where they seek a coach like me because I do work at all levels, body, mind, and soul. That makes sense.

Navigating the in-between before leaving corporate

Jess K 7:07

I feel like that's a lot of our work bestie community who tends to be high-performing um individuals who want to balance it all or think that they they are balancing it all and maybe not always fully fulfilled. You you made you make the comment that you're you were a seeker and you were always thinking about other things. So it sounds like you were at one point still working in your current job while thinking these things. So, how did you navigate that in between where you have that current company or current role before you became this feminine coach?

The Retreat That Changed Everything

Defining Intuition And The Clairs

Elena Donskaya 7:46

Well, I started to have those nudges, those whispers of my intuition. And I feel like every single woman has them. So, in those moments while I was still in corporate and having those nudges that I'm meant to do something else, there's more to me. I started to have dreams, I started to have visions, I started to have books falling off the shelves, I started to have teachers come into my life. And what's what what I started to do is I started to follow those breadcrumbs. And I know not a lot of people, not a lot of women, because I now work with women, right? I see that sometimes women are afraid to follow that intuition because they don't trust themselves. And why they don't trust themselves is because through the through a time, through since we were born, through our caregivers, through the society that we live in, through everything that's happening to us, we've been always programmed and conditioned to rely on our logic. And believe me, I'm very good with logic. I worked in investment banking, in finance, I have an MBA. Give me logic, give me science, give me all these things, right? Like I'm I need that. But we also have that side to us when we trust our heart, when we follow our intuition, when we are becoming more sensual so we can feel things more than just logically explain things. So I started to do things that might not be logical for a lot of people. Can you give us an example of that? I saw on Instagram this woman running a retreat in Glastonbury, UK, and that's near Stonehenge. It's a sacred site, it's a very powerful, energetically powerful place. Talking about how we women experience guilt, how we always put everybody else first versus us. It's it's innately building on us, right? Right. So I see this retreat and it falls on a date. It starts on a date of my wedding anniversary, 15-year wedding anniversary, and my daughter's middle school prom. What kind of wife and a mother would skip those things? I would say, not me. I'm a good mother. Oh, I cannot go on this retreat, but there's something that would not leave me alone, that I have to be there. So I spoke to my husband and he supported me through this whole journey. Anyway, I went on this retreat. Good for you. Even though there was so much guilt, there was so much going on inside of me that we would we don't do these things, right? So I went on a retreat and it was a remembrance of who I am. That retreat really shifted something within me, and I had like a divine feminine awakening in this place. I had so many soul memories come back to me. When I came back from that retreat, I went straight into my manager's office. And was I afraid? Of course I was afraid. Who won't be afraid when you work for so long and build a career? But I said, I'm gonna be resigning. I mean, I had like an exit plan after that, but I was brave enough to say that. So I what I wanted to say is that I follow my intuition, and this into and my intuition always led me to the most amazing places until this day. Intuition is the most powerful tool a woman can have for her family, for her, for her partner, for herself. It's an asset, and this is what's gonna really differentiate whatever field you're in. This becomes the most important thing a woman needs to have right now. Like it doesn't matter what you're doing, what matters is who you are being while you're doing it. So this is what I work with women, and this is what I'm passionate of. Awakening that within women because there's nothing that I'm sharing is new to your soul. This is ancient wisdom and knowledge, which is just we're remembering within ourselves. That's the difference.

Jess K 11:26

Elena, you make these comments about the intuition. Is there some type of thing that maybe people are misinterpreting that is an intuition that once you recognize it might make them think a little differently?

Balancing Logic And Intuition

Elena Donskaya 11:41

Great question, because it is this unknown. Like, what is it? Like some people call it a sixth sense. It's not as tangible, right? Because the sensations that we have, the eyesight, right? The the hearing, like we can really name it, but when it comes to intuition, like what exactly it, right? So I feel the way I define it as intuition is your soul, that divine part of you that exists. Just because you don't see it, just because we don't see Wi-Fi between us, right? It's there. Same thing. There's a signal, right? There is a signal. And when that signal comes in through your body, through your sensations, this is your intuition. And for different people, it's different because intuition, it's there are different clears. It's called clears. You can be clairvoyant when you can hear things, you can be clear sentient when you can feel things, you can be clear cognizant, which is what my clear is, which is inner knowing. You cannot explain how you know it, but you know it. And it always comes out to be true. It's this inner cog like inner cognition of sorts. And when you activate that, and everybody has them at a certain degree, but it takes through practice. This is what I do when I coach people, I help them activate that intuition and trust that intuition. And it's like going to the gym, it's like a muscle, right? For the most part, first thing you want to say is usually the intuition. When you start thinking about it and logically try to actualize it or explain it, it's your mind and your ego mind derailed you into a different answer. So I always suggest to listen to that first impulse. There's an there's different ways, different practices on how you can activate that intuition and start trusting that intuition. And it has to do a lot with the body. What I see in women, especially like high-achieving women, we're so numb. We get disconnected so much from our body that we don't really feel sensations. But intuition can speak through your body where you feel like goosebumps, maybe you have like a gut feeling, butterflies in your stomach, maybe some pumping in your chest. It's there, it's always there. You just have to trust it and follow it. But if you're if you don't trust it and you don't follow it, you start shutting it down, and it starts not showing up as often as you wish it would.

Claude F 13:53

Those intuition, you really want to drive towards those intuition. Like, is it for every part of your life, such as personal life, work life with your kids? So, really, how yeah, you know, because there's so much intuition that you can have.

Can intuition actually help with burnout?

Elena Donskaya 14:11

I definitely check in with my intuition about everything, every aspect of my life. But it doesn't mean that I don't follow logic or I make decisions that I make sense, right? Like it's not that I completely shut down my other side of my brain. Think about intuition as your feminine energy in in basic terms. Intuition is like your intuitive mind, right? And your masculine energy is your logical mind. You need both. The beauty and mastery of this life experience is to balance both.

Claude F 14:41

But that's why I don't understand. How does intuition can stop you from burnout? Because at the end of the day, you always need, I mean, you have to do things that is going to bring you to burnout.

Magnetism, Alignment, And Ease

Finding Truth Through Core Values

Elena Donskaya 14:57

So there is a there is a subtle difference. So, of course, you need to do things on what I call 3D world plane, right? Like you have to go on a subway to get to work, you need to feed your kids, you need to do all the things, right? Like you need to do that. But when you only rely on your logic and on your mind, you think a lot. We think about 70,000 thoughts a day, 95% of them on autopilot. You don't just burn out because you're doing things, because you're washing dishes, dressing up your kids. And most women, and that's what nobody knows about these things because nobody teaches us in school. We burn out because we overthink. We burn out because of all the things that are happening in our head. We burn out because we have these worst case scenarios constantly playing. We burn out because we have these doom scenarios constantly playing, right? We burn out not just because we're doing things, which is like a small percentage of time, right? It's because we overthink, overanalyze, compare. There's so many things we're doing. This is how we burn out. But when a woman tells me I don't have a 15 minutes to meditate, I say you need 30 minutes. If you don't have a 15 minutes to meditate, it means you're so busy. You need at least half an hour to an hour to meditate a day, at least in the beginning. Because when you start opening up that space within you, when you don't overthink, when you don't overanalyze. So, what I'm thinking is the burnout happens a lot from the invisible things that's happening within us, invisible structures, and our nervous system gets tired so much because of that. So when I speak about intuition, it's just not just this idea I follow my intuition to go on a retreat. Feminine energy is more is more than that, right? Feminine energy has to do a lot with receptivity and magnetism, right? It's when you don't do things but attract things. When you attract things, when you attract help, when you attract answers, imagine you have an idea to do something in your business, in your in your career, right? And you get this intuitive hit and you tell it to your team, and your team does it in one day, versus you've been over analyzing it for weeks, your team says been producing reports, you've been doing all these things, and then it's all two ways because you were never aligned with the right answer.

Jess K 17:25

Aline, it almost feels like intuition in some sort of way is the power to give yourself the pause to take the time to think and make it more clear. So it's like a clarity moment.

Elena Donskaya 17:37

It is a clarity. So intuition, I think this is what all women are really looking for and seeking because I see it across the board with all my clients. Like, I want clarity, I want clarity what to do.

Jess K 17:49

But uh to your point, like you can't answer that for people. People have to answer the clarity themselves.

What it means to find your truth

Elena Donskaya 17:55

I'm telling you, it's not something really like a woo-woo out there, it's actually science. You can really build that muscle when you trust yourself, when you trust yourself and your decisions. And I'm not necessarily necessarily saying that I have all the answers to all the things that ever will happen to me, but you follow those breadcrumbs, right? And you are in I call alignment. When you're in alignment with your truth, you don't have as much of a friction to go through life. It's a more of a smooth ride versus there are constantly obstacles and challenges that you have to navigate through.

Claude F 18:29

How do you learn what is your truth? Is that where you're coming in? Because again, I think that's where I really love the way you you're saying it's like that clarity to stop. Because sometimes we think too so much that I mean, you ask me what is my truth. I don't know. Well, I'm sure you know yours, but I was like, do you have me to tell you what I did? I know what your truth is. But you know what I mean? And that's where also your intuition helps you to understand what's your truth. For sure.

Elena Donskaya 18:59

And there's an universal truth, where we come from, what are we here, what is our life purpose. And I think when I started big and then went down, I started to filter it down to like more what is my truth? And my truth became my core values, right? The way I treat myself, the way I treat people, the way I go about my life. When you start seeking those universal truths and like those key aspects of what I call mastery, right? About integrity, about love, about self-worth, about your self-expression, like all these things, you start little by little identifying because I think it's very important for each woman to find their own truth. Because if they don't find their own truth, they're always gonna be picking up on the truth of somebody else. They're always gonna be using someone else's ideal of life. That's interesting.

Rapid-Fire Clarity Prompts

Jess K 19:53

Elena, we have a fun experiment we want to do with you. Sure. I have some rapid fire clarity questions since clearly I'm now on this clarity kick. And we thought we would see your comment with a statement, and then you can end it for us. A pivot is a good idea when you burn out.

Claude F 20:16

Okay. If you feel stuck, the first move is go into solitude and self-stillness.

Elena Donskaya 20:24

Sit with yourself. A boundary that changes everything.

Claude F 20:30

When you love yourself and put yourself first. I like that one. And your next step doesn't need to be perfect, it's it needs to be taken, just taken. Good.

Where To Find Elena & Final Note

Jess K 20:42

Man, I love those ones. I love your question. I know if uh if if uh the work bestie community doesn't know what to do after that, I know that was I got chills for that. Alina, how can people find you? How can our work bestie community connect with you?

Elena Donskaya 20:57

I'm omnipresent on all the platforms. So I have my Instagram handle is Elena Visionary. That's my brand name. And on LinkedIn, um is Elena Donskaya. And I I recently opened a community on school. It's called Awakened Woman Academy. And anybody can join, it's free, and it's um it has a bunch of masterclasses, practices. All the things that I've discussed with you have practices on how you can open your intuition, I have practices on how you can do morning meditations and rituals and different masterclasses on how you can step more into your power, more into your femininity. And I wanted to just end our conversation by saying feminine energy is not weakness. A lot of women think about this feminine energy is like wearing dresses and like pink lipsticks and whatnot. It's fierce, it's a force, it's so powerful. And when we women need that part of themselves, those words like burnout and all the others will not even be in your vocabulary. You're gonna Have so much clarity, you're gonna have so much intention, boundaries, and just it's it's very, very powerful.

Jess K 22:07

Thank you so much, Elena. Thank you. Okay, work besties. We now know our clarity moment just comes by taking action. So thank you all, and we'll see you next week. Bye! Thank you so much. Remember, whether you're swapping snacks in the break room, rescuing each other from endless meetings, or just sending that perfectly timed meme. Having a work bestie is like having your own personal hype squad.

Claude F 22:31

So keep lifting each other up, laughing through the chaos, and of course, thriving. Until next time, stay positive, stay productive, and don't forget to keep supporting each other. Work besties!